No quiero que te vayas

The phrase "No quiero que te vayas" is one with which we are all familiar. Well, at least it's English equivalent: "I don't want you to go". Sometimes it's being said by our boyfriends or girlfriends; sometimes our parents and siblings; sometimes our best friends. Too often it is being said by ourselves to ourselves.

The biggest mistake you can make when deciding whether or not to travel, study or live abroad is to allow that fear to cloud your vision.

Can it be terrifying to think of leaving your home and the people you care about for a strange city full of even stranger people? Absolutely. Even the most seasoned of travelers will tell you that they get nervous before venturing off to foreign lands unknown. But they would also tell you that the unlocked potential waiting inside each and every trip abroad far outweighs any list of apprehensions you can concoct within your own consciousness.

The problem is this: the ropes that tether you to that fear, that inner voice begging you not to risk it, are always going to be more formidable than the waves of excitement pushing you forward. If you've ever weighed the decision to go abroad or accept new job or even which school to attend, then you understand the feeling of push-and-pull accompanying that decision. It helps to keep in mind that you are not actually tethered to those fears and that the only person who can bind them tighter or allow them to loosen is yourself; but, of course, keeping hold of that rationale can be very, very difficult.

Now here's the good news: it's all in your head.

Do you need to think about your decision before you make it? Of course. Is traveling abroad the right move for everyone? Definitely not. But, if it is right for you, never ever let a list of 'what-ifs' stop you from the adventure of a lifetime.

So, enough of the metaphors and the pep talks. Here is a list of the classic do's and don'ts of moving/living/traveling abroad, in my oh-so-humble opinion:

• DO your research and see if this is a place you are genuinely attracted to. Just because your BFF thinks the Eiffel Tower is the most stunning piece of architecture known to man, doesn't mean you need to drop an entire paycheck on a flight to Paris. Conversely, just because someone tells you how unappealing an indigenous excursion "really is", doesn't mean you won't love camping in the outback or trekking through the Andes. This trip is yours and no one else's. 
• DO look at your finances beforehand and make sure you are covered. Nothing ruins a trip like running out of money for food and accommodations. Remember: you can alert your credit card companies regarding upcoming travel, so bringing along a commonly accepted card is a good safety net. 
• DO remind yourself of the amazing adventure you're about to embark on. If you're a planner, make an itinerary for your travels; if you're more of a Vivian Ward* "fly by the seat of my pants gal" (or guy), then let your gut be your guide. It will rarely lead you astray.
• *Addendum: DO NOT attempt the more salacious aspects of the Vivian Ward lifestyle, either at home or abroad. This fake character was a professional at her job and it should never be attempted by the viewers at home. However, should you run into an Edward Lewis look-a-like who will whisk you away and climb your fire escape with roses in his mouth, then I say go for it. 
• DO talk to people who have done something similar. Ask them why they chose to go abroad and how it compared to their expectations. If they had reservations, they can share those with you and tell you what eventually became of them. And if they have travelled to the same place as you are planning on visiting (or know someone who has), they can give you firsthand tips, tricks and advice to help you ease your mind and prepare for your trip. 

• DON'T be thinking about "all the stuff I'd be missing at home" - this can easily become your excuse not to travel abroad and it is never worth it. If you're in college, I promise you the keg parties will be waiting for you when you get back. If you're worried about missing a friend's birthday party while you're away on a month-long retreat in Thailand, tell her how sorry you are to be missing it; odds are, she'll tell you not to be silly and that she wishes she could be there with you, instead of you being home with her. If you're super cool and in a bowling league like I am, remind yourself that the Spanish word for 'strike' is probably way cooler than ours in English. Plus, think of how many friends you're going to rake in with your sweet alley moves. 
• DON'T give up on an opportunity because it will take you away from your significant other. As much as we like to deny it, this is probably the most difficult item on the list. Make sure you talk to your "other half" and tell them about your concerns. Find out what concerns they have and how this trip will affect the two of you as a couple. Remember that they CAN go with you or visit, and even though five months in Greece can seem like a lifetime now, it's nothing compared to the long haul you plan on battling through with each other. No one who loves you unconditionally and cares for you would want you to miss out on a life-changing experience; and if they truly are a "significant" other, they'll support you no matter what. 
• DON'T expect everything to be a disaster OR expect everything to be perfect. Just like your life at home, your time spent traveling will deal you a fair share of ups and downs. For some people, the first few days can be extremely overwhelming; for others, the homesickness pops up after the initial excitement has died down; and some people never end up homesick and don't want to leave. Your experience is unique and no two people will ever quite understand the road another person travels. This is true at home and it will be true wherever you end up around the world. 

So just remember that sometimes "Ya me despido": "It's time to say goodbye". As the cliché goes, when one door closes, another door opens. Just don't stare too hard at the closed door and let a wonderful experience pass you by.